DAF #36 - Atlantis: The Lost Empire (2001)

Milo: "Who are you? How did you get here?"
Helga: "I came down the chimney. Ho, ho, ho."

Year: 2001

Rated: PG (for action violence)

Run Time: 1 hour, 35 minutes

Starring
Michael J. Fox as Milo James Thatch
James Garner as Commander Lyle Tiberius Rourke
Claudia Christian as Helga Katrina Sinclair
Cree Summer as Princess "Kida" Kidagakesh
Corey Burton as Gaetan "The Mole" Moliere
Phil Morris as Dr. Joshua Strongbear Sweet
Don Novello as Vincenzo "Vinnie" Santorini
Jacqueline Obradors as Audrey Rocio Ramirez
Jim Varney as Jebidiah Allardyce "Cookie" Farnsworth
Florence Stanley as Wilhemina Bertha Packard
Leonard Nimoy as King Kashekim Nedakh
John Mahoney as Preston B. Whitmore
 
Plot: A young adventurer joins an intrepid group of explorers to find the mysterious lost continent of Atlantis.
Based on: Original story...and the myth of Atlantis.
Setting: 1914, Washington D.C./Atlantis.

First Viewing: 2006. First Disney Marathon.

Comments
2001. I was thirteen and about as far away from caring about Disney Animated Features as I ever was. Yes, I still loved my old favorites, but I, along with nearly everyone else, recognized that the Disney Renaissance was over. The sun had set on the golden empire and who knew if it would ever rise again? At that point, I think I had maybe seen Tarzan, probably on TV and probably because nothing better was on.

Coming off of the Disney Renaissance, I guess the company wanted something new and different. To hell with fairy tales, big Broadway songs, and and romance! We want action, action, ACTION! Explosions! Sci-fi! Fart jokes! And those oh-so-precious teenage boys who never liked their movies to begin with would certainly pay to see a movie with all that! Thus, in 2001, Atlantis: The Lost Empire was released.

In 1914, a nerdy young lad named Milo J. Thatch works in the boiler room at the Smithsonian. His true passion is to find the lost city of Atlantis through his linguistics and cartography skills. After the Smithsonian board members refuse his theories, Milo is contacted by his grandfather's millionaire best friend who has found the mysterious Shepherd's Journal, an ancient tome with directions to Atlantis. The millionaire (settling up on a bet) offers to fund the entire journey and supply a dream team of experts.

On the expedition, Milo is eventually accepted by his comrades including the overly supportive Commander Rourke. After several hardships, the surviving (and most interesting) members of the crew make their way through tunnels and into air pocket revealing Atlantis. The group is met by Princess Kidagakash (a.k.a. "Kida") and some fellow Atlanteans who willingly accept the new visitors. In fact, the king is the only one who objects.

In the mean time, Milo and Kida bond over Atlantean culture while she explains the history of their dying way of life. Milo realizes that the blue crystals all the Atlanteans wear are powered by well, the Force essentially. When the pair return to the main city, Rourke and the crew are in the middle of capturing the Heart of Atlantis, meaning to sell it to the highest bidder.

Rourke, Milo, Kida, and the king travel to the Heart of Atlantis's location where Kida is chosen as its carrier. Rourke encapsulates her and transports her to the surface. Eventually the rest of the crew abandons their mercenary ways and side with Milo. Action, action, action...Rourke explodes. Milo saves Kida. The crew returns to the surfaces with riches and the lie that Atlantis was never found. Milo stays with Kida and helps the Atlanteans restore their culture to its former glory.

Sorry to have to do this, but I'm going to cheat. After a re-watching of Atlantis: The Lost Empire, it has come to my attention that I don't like it as much as I remember. I know, I know, it's sad, but these things happen.

But, let's start with what I do like: Milo James Thatch. Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Once upon a time, he was my most boneable of the Disney heroes. (His title has since been usurped...but you'll just have to wait to see by who...) I think it's probably obvious by now that I have a thing for nerds and Milo is certainly the nerdiest in the canon. Nearly all the other Disney male protagonists are strapping, virile, pinnacles of manhood. It's such a change up to have a hero who is more brains than brawn.

That's not to say that Milo can't hold his own in a fight. He does, after all, defeat Rourke who is twice his size. In my opinion, it's not the video games or the unopened action figures or the Star Wars bedsheets that turn women off to nerds...it's the assumed fragility. Nerds have a notorious (and unfair) reputation for being weak, perhaps cowardly and unable to protect said women if there was danger. Lorraine Baines from Back to the Future puts it best "I think a man should be strong so he can stand up for himself and protect the woman he loves." My point is...Milo Thatch is an underrated hero because not only is he super intelligent (in linguistics) but can also kick some ass when the situation calls for it.

Plus he's voiced by Michael J. Fox. Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Notoriously, Atlantis is one the DAF's with an actual princess that is not part of the Disney Princess Franchise. As of now, it's Snow White, Cinderella, Aurora, Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Pocahontas, Mulan, and Tiana. (Rapunzel is due to be added later this year). To get completely technical...Cinderella, Belle, and Tiana only become princesses through marriage. Pocahontas is a chief's daughter which (if you're trying to cover all your races and ethnicities the way those marketers are) is akin to a princess in 17th century America. And Mulan is the daughter of a soldier who marries a general. The closest she gets to royalty is hugging that emperor.

This is really a bullshit grievance. No one really likes this movie and those who do don't like it because of Kida. Seriously, the only thing interesting about her is her design. There's nothing negative about her per se. She is trying to help her people. No other Disney princess can claim that, certainly. But frankly, she's just so boring! However, boring or not, if she were Latina, you know her ass would be on those bedsheets right beside Belle and Aurora.

I think my problem with Atlantis is a common complaint among Disney-philes and the average boob: it's a story that's been done to death and a story that's been done better. (No, I don't know a damn thing about Stargate).There really isn't anything special about the movie, save for finally having a nerdy hero. But I'll bet I'm one of the few that thinks this is a good point. I just don't really enjoy it.

Still, I respect it for daring to be different. And I pity it. (You know how I am about movies that nobody likes).I would never wish it out of the canon, despite its box office disappointment. But I would never just pick it off my shelf to watch.

Songs
"Where the Dream Takes You" - Mya
"Atlantis 2002" - No Angels feat. Donovan (from the German release)

Favorite Song: "Atlantis 2002"
Favorite Moment: The initial meeting of the crew.
Favorite Character: Milo Thatch

You wanna know why his pants are so puffy?
Because he's PACKIN'!

Next DAF: The Black Cauldron (1985)

DAF #28 - The Rescuers Down Under (1990)

Cody: "There must be a way out of here."
Krebs: "Oh, there's a way out, all right."
Red: "There is?"
Krebs: "Absolutely! You'll go as a wallet. You'll go as a belt, and our dear Frank..."
Frank: "No, no, no! I don't want to hear!"
Krebs: "Frank will go as..."
Frank: "I can't hear you!"
Krebs: "...a purse."

Title: The Rescuers Down Under

Year: 1990

Rated: G

Run Time: 1 hour, 14 minutes

Starring
Eva Gabor as Miss Bianca
Bob Newhart as Bernard
George C. Scott as Percival C. McLeach
Tristan Rogers as Jake
John Candy as Wilbur 
Adam Ryen as Cody
Wayne Robson as Frank
Douglas Seale as Krebbs
Peter Firth as Red
 
Plot: Bernard and Bianca travel to Australia to rescue young boy from a local poacher.
Based on: Original story based on characters from the children's novels The Rescuers and Miss Bianca by Margery Sharp.
Setting: Australia...I guess the 80's. There are computers!

First Viewing: Uh...90's.

Comments
Isn't it lucky how the "first official sequel" in the Disney canon comes right after its predecessor in my countdown?? I did that for you, dear readers, only for you. (Okay, it was just a lucky coincidence.) This may come as a shock, but there was a time when "Disney sequel" was a foreign phrase. A time when people were completely satisfied with the endings their DAF's, before anyone thought to make a cheap, cartoon continuation and release it on VHS alone. Yes, there was a time when Cinderella simply moved into the palace with Prince Charming and did not go on a ret-con time travel adventure.*

And that time was the late 80's. For some reason, Disney then finally decided to produce a sequel to one of their beloved family classics. But which one? Certainly Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty were all out of the question; those heroines were in a land far, far away living happily ever after. To disrupt their fairy tale endings would be a travesty. What about Pinocchio, Dumbo, and Bambi? Real boy, reunited with his mother, Prince of the Forest.

Just wait, I can keep going...

Peter Pan, Lady and the Tramp, 101 Dalmatians, The Aristocats, The Fox and the Hound: All would have to be stories concerning the protagonist's children. (A concept that did not strike the Disney company until much later.)

Fantasia, Alice in Wonderland, The Black Cauldron: Box office disappointments. A sequel wouldn't be the best idea, would it?

The Sword in the Stone: Wart's wife cheats on him with his best friend and he's killed by his bastard son/nephew while his kingdom crumbles.

The Jungle Book: Mowgli becomes a civilized young man, loses the the loincloth and never returns to the jungle.

Robin Hood: King Richard "returns to the throne" and Robin marries Maid Marian. Taxes are lowered, Robin gets to having those dozen kids.

So what does that leave? The Rescuers and The Great Mouse Detective, both adventures about mission bound mouse duos, both easily tailored for sequels. In fact, the two movies end with the protagonists leaving on "another rescue mission/mystery". But The Rescuers had the financial edge (well, 12 years ago it did) and The Great Mouse Detective was a mediocre box office draw that will, unfortunately, forever remain in the shadow of Don Bluth's An American Tail.

Despite there being nine books in The Rescuers Series by Margery Sharp, Disney opted to write a brand new original adventure where Bernard and Miss Bianca go to Australia.

As I'm sure you remember, in the late 1980's, the US experienced a short-lived infatuation with Australian culture. For some bizarre reason, the Aussies thought this would be a permanent thing. Of course, it wasn't.

- Bart vs. Australia, The Simpsons

Were truer words ever said? Think about it: Crocodile Dundee. "Down Under" by Men at Work. Crocodile Dundee II. A Cry in the Dark. The Man From Snowy River. The Thorn Birds. Outback Steakhouse. Quigley Down Under...and then, Disney's 29th animated feature.

Deep in the Australian Outback, a young boy named Cody starts his day by talking to his animal friends and rescuing a GIANT golden eagle he christens Marahute. She lets him ride around on her back and shows her nest and eggs. However, Cody is captured by the evil poacher, Percival C. McLeach, who holds him prisoner until he reveals the location of Marahute.

Meanwhile, some breed of Australian mouse sends a message to the Rescue Aid Society Headquarters in New York City. Bernard and Miss Bianca, who are still together (and alive, after thirteen years) are assigned to the case, interrupting Bernard's marriage proposal. But, as he said in 1977's adventure, "Duty calls."

The duo go to find Orville the albatross who flew them to Devil's Bayou in the first film. Instead they find his brother, Wilbur, who agrees to fly them all the way to Australia. When they arrive, they meet Jake the kangaroo rat, Disney's answer to Crocodile Dundee and Lando Calrissian. Jake is the local RAS agent and serves as Bianca and Bernard's guide on the trek to find Cody.

At McLeach's lair, Cody is held captive with the poacher's other imprisoned animals. After a failed escape attempt, McLeach decides to trick Cody into thinking someone else has killed Marahute. He frees the boy and follows him right to the eagle's nest. Bianca, Bernard, and Jake warn Cody, but they are captured along with Marahute. But Bernard is separated from the group.

Bernard replaces Marahute's eggs with rocks so McLeach's giant lizard Joanna won't eat them and then enlists Wilbur to sit on the real eggs. While McLeach threatens to feed Cody to a group of crocodiles, Bernard takes a cue from Jake's outdoorsman ways and takes control of a wild pig. McLeach eventually falls over a waterfall to his death. Jake and Bianca free Marahute who rescues Cody from a similar watery death. In the end, Bernard successfully proposes to Bianca. Cody is returned home and Marahute's eggs hatch under Wilbur.

So why do I technically like TRDU more than its predecessor? Oh, it's the little things. For one, the humor is a bit more...mature. For instance, when Wilbur is flying into Australia, he insists on landing even though the runway is too short. Jake quips, "Crazy Yank." There are a few pop culture references ("Throw another shrimp on the barbie.") Plus you have the sarcastic, pessimistic character of Krebs the Koala, one of McLeach's imprisoned animals. And what about that morbid scene where Wilbur is tormented in that mouse hospital? Medical torture! HAHAHAHAHA!

As with any good sequel, The Rescuers Down Under sports the same characters you fell in love with from the first movie. Bianca is still poised and proper and Bernard is still superstitious and bumbling. Some of the same jokes are reused ("Couldn't we just take the train?") One of the best inside jokes is when Jake walks his fingers as a precursor to putting his arm around Bianca. In the first movie, Bernard did the same thing, only it was a bit more tentative.

I'm glad to see Bianca and Bernard as a couple still. Their romance was never a big deal in the first movie and I'm happy to say that it's just as important here. Bringing in the wildly charismatic and swashbuckling Jake as a romantic rival was an interesting choice. As feminine as Bianca is, she does like a good adventure and Jake isn't nearly as cautious as Bernard. No wonder he feels threatened.

It's always bit jarring when one goes through the canon, through all the classics, the package films, the xerography and you finally arrive at The Little Mermaid; The light at the end of the tunnel. The dawn of The Disney Renaissance. You think, "I made it! It's going to be nothing but Broadway caliber show tunes and solid stories for the next ten films!" And then you remember, "Oh wait. The Rescuers Down Under. Sure. Okay."

Clearly, this movie is a bit of a hitch in the get along and something about it doesn't really go with the other 90's DAF's. It's still wonderful, but it had the unfortunate luck to be released between The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast. Then with the coming of Aladdin and The Lion King, everyone pretty much didn't give a shit about The Rescuers Down Under. It got lost in the shuffle. That doesn't mean that it doesn't have its fans; mostly boys. But I'll be the first to admit, this is one of the great underrated DAF's. I'd advised anyone to give it a second chance.

Songs
None

Favorite Song: N/A
Favorite Moment: Bernard takes control of the wild pig.

Favorite Character: Krebbs

Next DAF: Atlantis: The Lost Empire (2001)

*I actually really like Cinderella III: A Twist in Time. It's Back to the Future-Part II meets Disney.

DAF #29 - The Rescuers (1977)

Bianca: "Doesn't he fly beautifully? And you wanted to take the train, you fraidy cat. "
Bernard: "Fraidy cat? No, uh... it's just that I like trains. I mean, they serve Roquefort."

Title: The Rescuers

Year: 1977

Rated: G

Run Time: 1 hour, 17 minutes

Starring
Eva Gabor as Miss Bianca
Bob Newhart as Bernard
Geraldine Page as Madame Medusa
Michelle Stacy as Penny
Jim Jordan as Orville
John McIntire as Rufus
Joe Flynn as Mr. Snoops
Pat Buttram as Luke
Jeanette Nolan as Ellie Mae
 
Plot: Two mice of the Rescue Aid Society search for a little girl kidnapped by unscrupulous treasure hunters.
Based on: The children's novels The Rescuers and Miss Bianca by Margery Sharp.
Setting: New York City and Louisiana, the 1970's.

Tagline: A girl in danger... A cry for help... And two marvelous mice who will risk anything to save her!

First Viewing: Oh crap, let's just go with the 90's.

Comments
A while back, I stated that the 80's were not a good decade for Disney. Well, that was true until the coming of Who Framed Roger Rabbit? and The Little Mermaid in 1988 and 1989, when Disney went back to holding the American family film viewing crowd by the balls. Before that, however, was the 70's which was a barren wasteland in comparison, at least in terms of animated fare. Four DAF's were released in that groovy decade, all of which have been reviewed here in a rather tight succession. (Coincidence?) However, I've saved the best for last. I am speaking of The Rescuers, the only bright spot (a.k.a. the only money-making DAF) of the decade.

After the death of Walt Disney in 1966, Disney Animated Features pretty much went down the crapper. The Aristocats was the first of the DAF's to be released without being touched by The Man himself, although the story was reportedly approved. Then came Robin Hood, which seems like the whole thing was made in a hungover stupor. And finally, the hap-dash quick fix, Winnie the Pooh package film. As you can imagine, these films did okay at the box office. (Never underestimate the crap parents will take their kids to to shut them up). But, The Rescuers did pretty fucking good. It was even one of the highest grossing movies of 1977...you know, just a tad bit behind Star Wars and Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

The film begins in an abandoned river boat in Devil's Bayou when little orphan Penny throws a message in a bottle into the river. Through a series of matte paintings (and a wicked awesome song!) we see the bottle's journey to New York City and eventually into the hands of the Rescue Aide Society, a UN type of organization of mice who's main concern is, well, rescuing wayward humans.

The message is read by the sexy Hungarian representative, Miss Bianca, who eagerly volunteers for the case. However, the bumbling and over protective janitor Bernard thinks she ought to have a man go with her and she consents. The two visit the Morningside Orphanage where Penny originally lived. They talk to the old house cat, Rufus, who says a woman named Madame Medusa was trying to lure Penny into her car and was probably kidnapped by her.

Bianca and Bernard go to Medusa's pawn shop and learn that she and her inept sidekick Mr. Snoops are in search of "the world's biggest diamond", the Devil's Eye. Penny is somehow a pawn in this quest and is down in Louisiana with Snoops. Bianca and Bernard waste no time in hitching a ride to The Pelican State on the back of an albatross named Orville.

Upon arriving, the mice meet a bevy of swamp folk including Evinrude the dragonfly, the resident sea captain and Ellie Mae and Luke, Disney's answer to Ma and Pa Kettle. Bianca and Bernard are directed to the riverboat where they meet Penny. She explains that she's ritualistically sent down a hole into a pirate's cave where the Devil's Eye is rumored to be located.

Due to a botched escape plan, Penny is forced down the hole the next morning. Luckily, Bianca and Bernard accompany her and soon find the stone. Once Medusa has the diamond, she attempts to steal it without letting Snoops in on the deal. She hides it in Penny's beloved Teddy bear. However, with the aid of the swamp folk, the mice and Penny take back the diamond leaving Medusa at the hands of her pet alligators.

Back in the Big Apple, the Rescue Aide Society watch a news broadcast and learn that the Devil's Eye was given to the Smithsonian Institution and Penny was adopted. (How in the hell did they get back to New York?) Bernard and Bianca remain mission partners and set out on a new adventure, this time with Evinrude.

Upon re-watching The Rescuers, I was surprised at how "Post Women's Movement" it was. Before I open up the Disney Sexism file, let me just state that every movie ever, Disney or not, is a product of its time. Social mores change and sometimes some unfortunate, politically incorrect ideas (to us in the 21st century) are frozen onto celluloid. However, since Disney movies are specifically targeted at children, they usually get the Responsible Film Making finger wagged in their face more than say, Paramount or Universal.

We've all heard it before:  Disney perpetuates negative feminine stereotypes. As an adult, I can accept Cinderella's passiveness as an example of the re-femininization of women after World War II. I can also accept Mulan's all around badassery is a product of late 90's Gurrrrl Power. But when a little girl watches Cinderella and Mulan back to back, she is not going to know (or care) that one movie was made in 1950 and the other in 1998. So, I sort of get the bra-burners' argument.

I am here to argue that up to this point in the DAF canon, The Rescuers has the strongest female characters. At the forefront is Miss Bianca, the composed, elegant, and intelligent Hungarian mousetress. She is brave, ready to take on any mission but undeniably feminine at the same time. Bianca falls to the same womanly wiles that plague us all! She wears perfume and packs to many things whilst traveling. On board Orville, Bernard says to buckle her seat belt to which she responds, "I can't. It will wrinkle my dress." In these respects, Bianca is one of the most girly (and annoying) of Disney heroines. But her Bianca shows us there is a happy medium. So don't feel bad if you're not a karate chopping, sword wielding warrior princess. We can have adventure, thrive on our wits, and look and smell good while doing it.

On the other side of the good vs. evil spectrum is one of the most underrated villains, Madame Medusa. She often falls into the skeletal shadow of Cruella de Vil. (Seriously, why must she be the go to Disney villainess?) Both are greedy, both are horrendous drivers, and both have over the top personalities. But unlike Cruella, Medusa actually interacts with the her oppressed little victim. She sweet talks Penny while at the same time hitting on her weaknesses: "What makes you think anyone would want a homely little girl like you?" and thus cementing her control.

Of course, Disney villainesses are always strong and independent so my little Feminist argument is kind of wash with Medusa. But let's take a look at Penny. It's probably safe to say she is the most annoying of all Disney children because of her slight lisp and all around treacly nature. But she is does take initiative. Yes, she was dumb enough to get kidnapped (although did she willingly get into Medusa's car? Do they ever fully explain that?), BUT she is also strong enough to attempt escape. It fails, but she's a seven year old girl, of course she's going to failing. AND instead of surrendering to Stockholm Syndrome and a life with Mommy Medusa and Papa Snoops, she sends for help. I don't like Penny, but I respect her.

And finally, there's Ellie Mae, a small character, but still the leader of the Rescue Aid Society: Hee Haw Chapter. So you see? Strong female characters all around. It's interesting because it was only four years prior that Robin Hood, with it's most weak and distressed damsel ("Help, Robin! Help!") was released. Was Maid Marian complained about? Is that why every lady in The Rescuers is so strong? Or is it the source material? Hmmmmm...

Despite the last few paragraphs, there are other things about this movie I like. Say like the blossoming romance between Bernard and Bianca. It is mainly a B story, but always enjoyable when a flirtatious moment pops up. They are opposites, surely, and why, out of all the mice men, Bianca would pick Bernard is the stuff of nerdy male screenwriters. But just like all of Disney heroines can't be meek princesses, all the Disney heroes can't smooth-talking charmers.

And finally, there's the music WHICH I ABSOLUTELY LOVE!!! Here were are given the most 70's soundtrack possible. Well, easy listening 70's. There's no disco or progressive rock. (Damn it!) "The Journey", "Tomorrow is Another Day", and "Someone's Waiting For You" are all sweet, meandering little songs that would work perfectly in a dentist's office, each sung with breathy vocals and a sort of drunk, optimistic attitude. I can't help but smile when I hear these songs. It only makes me sad Disney didn't hire the Carpenters to do the music. Now that would have been the shit!

The Rescuers is a great Disney film. You don't hear many people say "The Rescuers. Pfft. I hate that one." because you can't hate it. There's nothing to outwardly dislike other than maybe Penny. It's easy to see why, out of all the DAF's, this one was the first chosen to have a sequel.

Songs
"The Journey" - Shelby Flint

"Rescue Aid Society" - Bernard Fox (Chairman), Bob Newhart (Bernard) and Robie Lester (Bianca)

"Tomorrow is Another Day" - Shelby Flint

"Someone's Waiting For You" - Shelby Flint

Favorite Song: “Someone's Waiting For You”
Favorite Moment: Medusa emotionally abuses to Penny.

Favorite Character: Bernard

Next DAF: The Rescuers Down Under (1990)

DAF #32 - The Aristocats (1970)

Uncle Waldo: "Prime Country Goose A la Provencale, stuffed with chestnuts"...? "And basted in white wine."
O'Malley: "Basted? He's been marinated in it."
Uncle Waldo: "Dreadful! Being British, I would've preferred sherry."

Title: The Aristocats

Year: 1970

Rated: G

Run Time: 1 hour, 18 minutes

Starring
Eva Gabor as Duchess
Phil Harris as Thomas O'Malley
Dean Clark as Berlioz
Liz English as Marie
Gary Dubin as Toulouse
Roddy Maude-Roxby as Edgar
Sterling Holloway as Roquefort
Pat Buttram as Napoleon
George Lindsey as Lafayette
Hermione Baddeley as Madame Adelaide Bonfamille
Scatman Crothers as Scat Cat
 
Plot: A disgruntled butler kidnaps a family of cats and abandons them in the French countryside after he learns they will inherit his wealthy mistress's fortune before him.
Based on: Original story.
Setting: France, 1910.

Tagline: DIG THESE CATS...and all that JAZZ!

First Viewing: 1996 after the Masterpiece Collection video release.

Comments
Aaaaand welcome to One Hundred and One Dalmatians-Part Deux! I jest, I jest. Although many will tell you that The Aristocats is simply a feline rip-off of the aforementioned film, I am here to disagree. If anything, it's One Hundred and One Dalmatians meets Lady and the Tramp, but more on that later.

Picture it: Gay Pareé, circa 1910. A pussy named Duchess lives with her three kittens Berlioz (the black one), Toulouse (the orange one), and Marie (the one with the pink bow) in the opulent mansion of Madame Adelaide Bonfamille along with her faithful butler, Edgar. Duchess and her children live a comfortable life and she urges them to become patrons of the arts; Marie sings, Berlioz plays the piano, and Toulouse paints.

One day, Madame changes her will stipulating that Edgar will inherit her entire fortune if he takes care of Duchess and her offspring until they die. He fears he will expire before the cats (you know, nine lives and all) so he hatches a plan to get rid of them.

Edgar drugs Duchess and the kittens and dumps them out in the country. However, two dogs, Napoleon and Lafayette (both with southern accents, oddly enough) give him a rough time and acquire his umbrella, hat, and sidecar to his motorcycle. Edgar escapes and is an exceptionally toe-tapping happy pants mood the next morning. Roquefort and Frou-Frou (mouse and horse friends to Duchess n' kids) discover THE BUTLER DID IT and Disney's original great mouse detective starts tailing Edgar.

Meanwhile, Duchess awakens in some horrid swamp far away from her soft bed and loving owner. Luckily, charming alley cat Thomas O'Malley sees the lovely lady and offers to take her anywhere she wishes to go. Even after he learns of her children, he still insists on guiding them first by stowing away on a milk truck and then by following pair of British geese sisters, Amelia and Abigail Gabble.

Cats and geese make it to Paris and part ways. It's too late to return to Madame's mansion just yet, so O'Malley takes Duchess and the kittens to his bachelor pad. There, the kittens meet Scat Cat and his jazz band. After rollicking fun, the kittens go to bed and Duchess and O'Malley discuss a possible marriage between the two. However, Duchess decides she cannot leave Madame and O'Malley is too much of an alley cat to completely settle down even in the lap of luxury.

The next morning, the cats return to the mansion and O'Malley departs. But Edgar is waiting with a Gunny-Sack of Doom. He locks the cats in a trunk soon to be sent to Timbuktu. Duchess tells Roquefort to find O'Malley. He returns with Scat Cat and his band of stereotypical nationality cats who fight off Edgar and send him to Africa instead. Later, Madame rewrites her will to exclude the missing Edgar and to include newlywed O'Malley.

Really, the only similarity between The Aristocats and One Hundred and One Dalmatians is they are both about a family of kidnapped pets trying to get back to their home. The differences are much more plentiful: one is set in 1910's France, while the other is "contemporary" soon-to-be swinging London; the whole family is kidnapped in one, while in the other it's just the kids; Duchess and O'Malley have a budding romance, while Pongo and Perdita are married; will stipulations vs. wanting a COAT MADE OF DOG FUR. Need I go on?

I'll admit there is a similar tone and structure to both films, but like I said above, The Aristocats is far more similar to Lady and the Tramp in theme. Both Duchess and Lady are pampered and loved by their owners and therefore, are fiercely loyal to said owners even when a dashing, devil-may-care scoundrel offers them a life of fun and freedom. Both females consider this alternate life but ultimately decide their masters need them more than they need romance. On the other side, both Tramp and O'Malley consider themselves too wild and below the social status of their mates to settle down.

Interestingly, The Aristocats gives a look into the dating life of the single mother. Now, just how Duchess came to be a single mother is never mentioned. Considering this is Disney, it can be concluded she was widowed. One of the kittens even says "Well, we almost had a father," after O'Malley and Duchess discuss their possible future. After O'Malley first hits on Duchess, he is surprised when he learns of her family. Duchess seems to understand his motives and decides to go back to Paris on her own. This says that she's maybe "dated" before but all the suitors don't want kids that ain't their own seed. O'Malley realizes he's being a dickweed and falls in love with Duchess and her children even though it conflicts with his hep-cat persona. In the end, he's happily domesticated in his nuclear family. (Gotta love those Disney morals!)

Both The Aristocats and One Hundred and One Dalmatians deal with some eccentric ladies. So as bat shit crazy as it is to make a dog fur coat, leaving one's entire fucking estate to a family of cats is just as bat shit crazy, even if it is infinitely more benevolent. Madame Bonfamille is surely a nice lady, but come on! You're leaving your money to cats! Cats don't use currency, lady. No one wonder Edgar wanted to get rid of them.

While Cruella DeVil is usually ranked as one of the top Disney villains, Edgar the butler always ranks dead last. Why? Well he's not eeeeeeeeeevil, technically. He's just greedy. He's dealt with this crazy old ex-opera singer and her equally crazy, elderly, rheumatic friends for GOD KNOWS HOW LONG. Then he learns all his years of loyal service were in vain because now a family of cats is inheriting Madame's vast fortune. So what does he do? He drugs the cats and leaves them out in the country. Does he poison them? No. Does he drown them? No. He abandons them. Honestly, if they never got back to Paris they would be fine BECAUSE THEY'RE FUCKING CATS and survival is their DNA.

Granted, it is cruel for Edgar to take away Madame's only friends, so I'm by no means saying he's a nice guy that deserved all that money. His end is rather cruel. He probably suffocated and/or starved to death in that trunk on his way to Timbuktu. Justifiable homicide? Eh, maybe. The cats probably would have met an untimely end as well, but again, Edgar's intent was to send them Far Away, not to asphyxiate them.

I like The Aristocats. It's a DAF that often gets the shaft because, yeah, it ain't that good. Boys don't usually like it either because it's about cats. The music is weak (according to me) and the animation is still that tried n' true cheap ass xerography. But, for it's "daring" single mother romance, I have to rank it higher. Honestly, I don't know why everyone loves 101D so much more whilst comparing these two. To me, they're about the same.

Songs
"The Aristocats" - Maurice Chevalier

"Scales and Arpeggios" - Liz English (Marie), Gary Dubin (Toulouse), Dean Clark (Berlioz) and Robie Lester (Duchess)

"Thomas O'Malley" - Phil Harris (O'Malley)

"Ev'rybody Wants to Be a Cat" - Phil Harris, Scatman Crothers (Scat Cat), Thurl Ravenscroft (Billy Boss), Vito Scotti (Peppo), and Paul Winchell (Shun Gon)

"She Never Felt Alone" - Robie Lester

"Ev'rybody Wants to Be a Cat (Reprise)" - Phil Harris, Scatman Crothers, Thurl Ravenscroft, Vito Scotti, and Paul Winchell

Favorite Song: “Scales and Arpeggios”
Favorite Moment: Thomas meets the Gabble Sisters.

Favorite Character: Toulouse

Next DAF: The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1977)

DAF #33 - One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961)

"As far as I could see, the old notion that a bachelor's life was so glamorous and carefree was all nonsense. It was downright dull."

-Pongo

Title: One Hundred and One Dalmatians

Year: 1961

Rated: G

Run Time: 1 hour, 19 minutes

Starring
Rod Taylor as Pongo
Lisa Daniels/Cate Bauer as Perdita
Betty Lou Gerson as Cruella De Vil
Ben Wright as Roger Radcliff
Lisa Davis as Anita Radcliff
Martha Wentworth as Nanny/Lucy/Queenie
Fred Worlock as Horace Badun

J. Pat O'Malley as Jasper Badun/The Colonel
Dave Frankham as Sergeant Tibs

Thurl Ravenscroft as The Captain

Plot: After their litter of puppies is stolen, two dalmatians seek to save them from becoming a fur coat.
Based on: The children's novel The Hundred and One Dalmatians by Dodie Smith
Setting: London and Southern England in the early 60's or late 50's.

Tagline: One great big ONEderful motion picture.

First Viewing: Uh...early 90's.

Comments
Not unlike The Fox and the Hound, One Hundred and One Dalmatians was a movie I didn't care for in my youth, but as I've grown older, I've come to respect it. No, I will not be comparing these two movies (how useless would that be?) and no, the reasons are not the same as you will soon learn.

In London, not so very long ago (Uh...the 60's), a dalmatian named Pongo lives with his owner Roger Radcliffe in a bachelor pad. Tired of the single life, Pongo starts looking for prospective mates for Roger and himself. He watches out the window as several lady/canine pairs cross his path, but naturally, Pongo is drawn to a cute dalmatian bitch and her svelte owner. Pongo urges Roger to the park where he and Anita have a "meet cute" by falling into a pond. Luckily, Roger and Anita have a good laugh about it. Some time later, both human and dog couples marry.

Roger, Anita, Pongo, and Perdita move into a small flat, along with their housekeeper, Nanny (by which I ask how in the hell can a struggling songwriter afford a maid??). It's not long before Perdita is expecting. On the night she gives birth to fifteen puppies, an "old schoolmate" of Anita's, Cruella De Vil, arrives wanting to purchase the whole litter. When Roger refuses to sell them, Cruella hires brothers Horace and Jasper to steal the puppies.

Roger and Anita file a report with Scotland Yard accusing Cruella, but she remains innocent. Pongo and Perdita take matters into their own paws a use the "Twilight Bark", a sort of doggie gossip chain, to ask for help. Colonel, an old sheepdog with his friends Captain (a horse) and Sergeant Tibbs (a cat), here the call and discovers the puppies are being held at Hell Hall, the "old De Vil place". Tibbs infiltrates Hell Hall and discovers 99 dalmatian puppies, most of which had be legally purchased from pet stores. He learns Cruella means to turn them into a fur coat. Tibbs sends this information down the Twilight Bark and Pongo and Perdita leave London to rescue their puppies.

Cruella orders Horace and Jasper to kill and skin the puppies that night, so Tibbs attempts to shuffle all 99 out of the house before the TV program the brothers are watching is over. Pongo and Perdita arrive to assist and insist on adopting the other 84 puppies. They begin traveling towards London, with Cruella and the Badun brothers not far behind.

 

 

While trying to catch the dogs, Cruella crashes her car into a van, allowing the dogs to escape to London. Meanwhile, Roger's song "Cruella De Vil" has become a big hit, but the couple misses their pets. Soon they arrive back home, much to their owners' delight. Roger and Anita decide to use the money made from the song to adopt all the dogs, bringing the count up to 101.

 

 

Let me begin by saying that I really do like 101D. However, I have a lot of logistical problems with it. I should probably just shut my mouth and take it for what it is; a charming, animal adventure in which good triumphs over evil. But I just can't let sleeping dogs lie. (Pun intended).

 

I love the beginning of this movie. The first ten minutes where Pongo shops around for wives is absolutely adorable. And the character design on the various women and their dogs is amusing and believable. When Roger and Anita and then Pongo and Perdita marry after a seemingly short period of time, I still believe that the couples will be happy. In fact, I think 101D is the only DAF that gives us a glimpse into a marriage, human or animal.

Everything seems just fine until the arrival of psycho bitch Cruella De Vil, an old schoolmate of Anita's. 

 

 

Wait. What? 

 

Anita, at the most has got to be around 27. Cruella is a corpse. How in the hell does that compute? Was Cruella a senior when Anita was in first grade? Or is this was cigarette smoking does? And another thing, how in the hell would Cruella know that Anita's dog just had puppies...or that her dog was a dalmatian...or that she even had a dog? It doesn't strike me as very likely that Cruella and Anita would keep up their acquaintance after school. This has always bothered me.

 

But then there's the real problem. Cruella De Vil is often cited at the "greatest Disney villain" because of her diabolical scheme to make a coat out the skins of dalmatian puppies.

 

Wait. What?

First of all, ew. 

 

Second of all, is there no such thing as faux fur circa 1961? 

 

Thirdly, why puppies? Is their fur softer? I pet a dalmatian once and his fur was short and spiky, not fuzzy like say, a bunny's. If it's simply the spots, can't you dye black spots on some kind of easily found white fur? If Cruella can afford to buy 84 puppies, then she can certainly afford to pay someone to dye spots onto a white fur coat. 

 

Fourthly, why 99 puppies? I know they're small but isn't 99 skins over-compensating? 

 

Fifthly, after Jasper and Horace supposedly skin all these dogs who in the hell is going to sew this coat together?

 

And lastly, how could Cruella ever wear it out in public? Surely if she said, "Yes, daaaarling, it's genuine dalmatian fur!" she would be cast out of the high society she operates in. She would have to lie and say it was faux which defeats the purpose of using real dalmatian fur.

So you see, this whole dalmatian coat concept is just to make Cruella eeeeeeeeeevil for the sake of being eeeeeeeeeeevil, because the movie needs a conflict. 

 

 

Granted, this isn't Disney's fault. Cruella was in the original 1956 novel, The Hundred and One Dalmatians by Dodie Smith. From everything I've read, it's a very fantastical type novel for kids, ala something written by Roald Dahl, so maybe I should shut the fuck up, huh?

No! I won't do it! Then there's the ending. How in the hell are Roger and Anita going to adopt all those puppies? Not only are they going to have to buy a new house in the country, but they need hire a shit ton of people to care for those dogs. And then those dogs will just breed more dogs and more dogs...AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I know, I know. Children's story. Shut the fuck up, Jordyn.

Onto the stuff I like! 101D is the first DAF to be set in "the modern day", save for a few segments in the package films. (But who gives a shit about those, am I right?) It is, indeed, the first to feature the new fangled television set and poke fun at it simultaneously. TV is satirized with "What's My Crime?", a parody of panel game shows featuring B list celebrities. Also the irritatingly catchy Kanine Krunchies commercial wreaks of 50's style jingles. The way the Pongoes are shown watching TV together as a family bonding experience is representative of American (and British?) families at this point in time, which also makes it sort of culturally relevant.

 

 

As far as music goes, 101D is pretty sparse with only three technical songs, two of which are ludicrously short. The biggie is "Cruella De Vil", which to me, has always been an okay song, but nothing to perform at a talent show, if you get my drift. Still, if I think about it, there really isn't any good spots to put in more songs.

Like I said before, I really do enjoy this movie, despite it's flaws of sublime ridiculousness in which I am the only one who can't get over. After the puppies leave Hell Hall it drags a bit, but it's still easily one of the best comic DAF's.

Songs
"Cruella De Vil" - Bill Lee (Roger)
"Kanine Krunchies" - Lucille Bliss
"Dalmatian Plantation" - Bill Lee

Favorite Song: “Kanine Krunchies" - Lucille Bliss
Favorite Moment: Pongo shops around.

Favorite Character: Sergeant Tibbs

Next DAF: The Aristocats (1970)